View profile

Fermentation and How It Controls Your Entire Life

$YAYO: From The Desk of John Lemaire
$YAYO: From The Desk of John Lemaire
Here at $YAYO we believe that modern consumerism has ruined the natural hierarchy of man. The marketer and the tower has replaced the aristocrat and the palace. No longer is birthright the natural order of man. Instead, the consumer and the corporation choose your roles in life. 
More specifically, your Lunchables preferences as a child are meant to railroad you down a specific pathway of where your role in life will be. The children who chose the cheese and cracker Lunchables were being groomed into becoming Charcuterie Appreciators, fit for a life of wealth and luxury. Don’t ask me what the pizza and the nachos means, enough people died getting us this information in the first place.
Charcuterie is the pinnacle of cuisine at its most natural and good form. All fine food is a culmination of time and patience. The process of fermenting something is what gives it a cultivated biome of healthy bacteria to line the gut towards altering your entire personality. If you ever want to reset your consciousness, just chug a whole bottle of goat kefir in one sitting on an empty stomach. Your gut is your true mind and at $YAYO we know that the healthiest guts eat the most ancient foods.
Charcuterie ferments nearly everything that participates in its experience. What is your tart smooth Pinot Noir but a pile of grapes that have been aged for years, if not decades, in oak barrels nestled deep within fine French cellars? Your meat is cured, salted, aged. Your olives, your little kosher tiny baby pickles, your marinated almonds, your stone ground mustard, and the very bread you eat is all rich in good bacteria. The cheese itself is a symbol of age and fermentation, its very being only possible through age. The living nature of charcuterie blends together in your belly and creates a powerful beautiful dance. A well done charcuterie over a few glasses of wine will make you feel high and airheaded after you’re finished. The raw bombardment of savory blends and distinguished tastes overwhelm the mind and palate, leaving you quivering as a serene plump cherubim laying on a marble bench in your Roman style villa.
Fermentation is ancient and good. Bears even ferment their food by burying meat under the dirt and returning to eat it after it has been softened and fermented. Much like wrestling, we learn ancient lessons from bears, as all animals have lessons to teach humanity.
$YAYO is fermented.
All good cryptocurrency is fermented. When you invest in something you are giving it into a process of incubation and growth. A wise investment’s success is the steady growing rise of a substance being filled with a natural life and energy.
The wealthy respect and love charcuterie. Wine is considered the most dignified and regal alcoholic substance. Wealth is a symbol of patience and timing. All signs lead to this underlying principle.
You will love charcuterie too if you don’t already. You’ll love it because you can afford to eat it every day after we’re done with you. And for the rest of your life, every time you rub some creamy goat cheese on a baguette slice and layer some soft thin prosciutto on it and drizzle it with just a dash of raw honey, you’ll think of $YAYO
Currently we are fermenting ideas and preparing for our great charcuterie release. If you wish to participate in this ensemble, you’re more than welcome to join us in our Discord, where we speak of luxury, violence, and aesthetics.

Did you enjoy this issue? Yes No
$YAYO: From The Desk of John Lemaire
$YAYO: From The Desk of John Lemaire @yayocorp

My correspondence will be transmitted directly to your inbox.

In order to unsubscribe, click here.
If you were forwarded this newsletter and you like it, you can subscribe here.
Created with Revue by Twitter.