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Issue 12: The Chicken

While roasted meats are not normally presented as palate cleansers, I believe that the recipe below h

Woman About the Internet

October 20 · Issue #12 · View online
I am a writer, mother, and decent human being living in Seattle, Washington. My monthly newsletter pairs perfectly with the everyday and the End of Days. I think you're swell.

While roasted meats are not normally presented as palate cleansers, I believe that the recipe below has the power to heal us all. Or some of us. Or at least provide sustenance before getting back to the witch hunt. This chicken came into my life three years ago during a dark Seattle winter that was as emotionally taxing as it was damp. Just when I needed it, one of the wisest women I know gently tucked a bag of ground mustard into my palm and passed along the recipe, which led me to months of cooking chicken as a meditative practice. In my house, this is known as Liz’s Chicken or simply The Chicken. Unlike like the inherently flawed bullshit concept of Engagement Chicken, this recipe will not let you down. The Chicken is here for you. So am I. 

The Chicken
  • 1 chicken, bag of guts included (I know, I know. Just deal with it)
  • 1 lemon (sometimes I’ll go wild and use two, but your call)
  • 2 tablespoons ground ginger
  • 2 tablespoons ground mustard
  • 2 onions
  • 1 bouillon cube (Rapunzel vegetable bouillon is really great but anything creeping in your pantry will do)
  • Carrots! Potatoes! Whatever your heart desires. 
  • Preheat oven to 425. Remove bag of guts from chicken.
  • Slice onions (not too thin) and lay them all over the bottom of a medium-sized roasting pan.
  • Squeeze lemon all over chicken. Stuff lemon quarters into the cavity. Place chicken on top of onions.
  • Sprinkle chicken with salt and pepper and then coat all sides of chicken with ground ginger and mustard mixture. Slap it on while envisioning an end to the patriarchy.
  • Brave the bag of guts. Place gizzards in a small saucepan with the bouillon cube and some water. Boil and simmer. 
  • Pop the whole chicken situation into the oven for 30 minutes. Set a timer. 
  • Did the timer go off? Turn the temperature down to 375 and pour the bouillion liquid over the onions. Definitely don’t drink it. Yet.
  • Add sliced carrots and potatoes to the roasting pan and coat with bouillon liquid. 
  • Cook for another 10-15 minutes. THEN start basting. 
  • Here’s where I’ll tell you to break out a meat thermometer so you don’t poison your family or dog. But that’s just me. You can also live on the edge and eyeball it. 
  • Baste chicken every 15-20 minutes until the internal temperature reaches 165 degrees. 
Makes enough for two dinners with a friend plus lunch leftovers that won’t make you sad. 
Finally, here is Maude, who is a fan of The Chicken but not of Alice, who only wants to love her.
Thank you to everyone who reached out after my last newsletter
I love you and you are deserving of great things.
Some of my other writing lives here. If you’d like to follow me on Instagram, you can do so right here. I also hang out on Twitter. You should email me with any pressing questions or desires.
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