The Long Game - Issue #104

I heard Tony say this on a podcast when explaining why he does a cold plunge every morning. He said he never wants to do it, but once he does, it drastically improves how he feels and gives him energy for the rest of the day. I feel the same way when I take a cold shower in the morning or do something else I find extremely uncomfortable. From time to time, I negotiate with myself and can rationalize why not to do something, but I try to remind myself of how good I will feel when it’s over. I preach about doing things that are uncomfortable and getting out of your comfort zone and, like most of my writing, it is also a reminder to myself for how I want to grow in this world.

One area that can be extremely uncomfortable for me is sales. Sales is something I have struggled with my whole life. My dad could tell you a great story about when he tried to get me to do a door to door sales campaign for my school as a kid. It may be the only thing I ever flat out refused to do and boy was he upset! believe this comes from my fear of rejection and caring too much about people saying “no.” Over the last year, I’ve gotten a lot better at this with the help of friends and mentors who’ve been in the sales game a long time. Each “no” just brings me closer to a “yes” and allows me to improve on my techniques. The uncomfortable physical activities I do also helps. The ice baths, the pool workouts, CrossFit, endurance events, and getting pounded in jiu-jitsu, all force me to improve my responses under pressure and deal with rejection. They help me “callous the mind” as David Goggins would say.

Where are you negotiating with yourself? Is it waking up early in the morning to get a workout in? Is it eating those extra sweets? Or, like me, is it putting off making that sales call you know you need to make? We all have areas in our life where we try to negotiate and rationalize doing something other than what we need to do. Tony’s quote is my new mantra that I taped to my computer as a daily reminder that there is no negotiating, just action. Take a look at your life and see what areas this mantra could help you.

With that said, let’s jump into this week’s links.

Benjamin Hardy starts off this article with his definition of success. “Success is continuously improving who you are, how you live, how you serve, and how you relate.” He goes on to discuss ways to do this. A few that I like in particular are: 1) Face your resistance and do what you are avoiding. If we tackle the things we are procrastinating on it will help us build confidence and it is something we can build on; 2) How you do anything is how you do everything. If you are cutting corners in one area of your life it throws you out of whack and you will subconsciously believe you are a fraud in other areas; and, 3) Only engage in transformational relationships. We all know those people that only show up when they need something. Do yourself a favor and cut them out of your life. They will suck the life out of you and only add stress. Find your tribe and stick to them.

When I talk to people about mindfulness, one of the biggest pushbacks I get is that they don’t have time. I used to think the same thing until I made the time for it. In fact, mindfulness actually clears up time for you. With a 10 minute practice in the morning, you will help yourself become more focused throughout the day. It will allow you to stay focused on the task at hand and effectively deal with all of the distractions we face. Aetna estimates it gained $3,000 per employee in productivity each year by incorporating mindfulness at the office. Google estimates it increased productivity by 62 minutes per employee with their mindfulness program.

 

I recently read this book and highly recommend it. Gary Chapman is a counselor and wrote the book for married couples, but I believe it is a good one for everyone to read. Chapman believes that we all have a need to feel loved and, in marriage, the number one person you need this from is your spouse. The book details how we express and experience love. The five languages are: words of affirmation, physical touch, quality time, acts of service, and receiving gifts. Learning these languages not only helps romantic relationships, but also how we respond to people in all relationships. He’s added on to this concept in books about the workplace, raising your kids, and single people. If you want to improve your relationships, check this out. It is short and easy to get through.

Somehow, this article got deleted from the email last week.

These reminders are nice to come back to from time to time. There are things we all know to be true, but get lost in the hustle and bustle of life. One that I frequently remind myself of is, “not to rush things.” The parts of life we try to blow through are the meat of our life. We need to be present and enjoy them. Don’t always be so focused on the next achievement or event. Enjoy where you are right now!

Before I go, check out a few more interesting reads I found this week

I hope you enjoyed another edition of The Long Game; feel free to pass it along. Have a great weekend!

In Health,

Taylor