FOX News is going too far. They’re now reporting that caravan is filled with transgender terrorist big-city rappers who are in MS-13 and refuse to kneel for the anthem and think Nanette is interesting but not actually comedy.
The great white whale of outrage culture is the great white male.
“There’s a lot of money in shipwrecks. I was watching this documentary and…” Every time I try listening to Joe Rogan’s podcast I remember why I can’t listen to Joe Rogan’s podcast.
My top NYC question: How do all these storefront psychics with ground floor locations afford to pay rent here? Seems weird that Toys R Us and Sears can’t stay afloat but St Marks Psychic Reader Palm & Tarot is raking it in. Maybe they just do really well in the stock market since…well, you know.
Sometimes people ask, “So are comedians really that dark and depressed?” My answer: Yes, but so is everyone else. Comedians are just the ones who tell the truth about it. Life is suffering. The two groups that admit it: comedians and Buddhists. #nationalmentalhealthday
To sum up politics, everyone in Brooklyn is voting for Hannah Gadsby but what America actually wants is Sebastian Maniscalco.
Kinda crazy how rich old Republican dudes strongly believe in diversifying their stock portfolio yet still don’t understand why diversity is important elsewhere.
Maybe we should use financial language to convince them:
Q: ”Why should I hire this [insert minority here]?”
A: “You’ll be spreading your payroll around so that your exposure to any one type of asset is limited thus reducing the volatility of your workforce over time. And as an added bonus, people won’t think you’re racist scum.”
(I actually think this could work. Maybe I’ve found my new calling as The Old White Man Whisperer. Tell me whatever you want to say to ‘em and I will translate it into OldWhiteMandarin™.)