Cult activity

By Gentle Zacharias

A weekly update on the activities of the Gentle Cult, including photographic evidence of our latest unholy creations, congregants' exploits in the field, and highlights from this week's sermons.

A weekly update on the activities of the Gentle Cult, including photographic evidence of our latest unholy creations, congregants' exploits in the field, and highlights from this week's sermons.

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Come to the Bumpin' Red Potato Place!

'Lo child,D'you like foxes? I'm a big fan.


Alert: Your Patience Account is Overdrawn

'Lo childs,Mea culpa, and so forth. It's so very, very late at night here, and apparently that's what kind of creature I am naturally, a lurky night-dwelling thing. It's that horrendous period between about 8:00AM and noon that I can't stand - I just prefer t…


My love for you is like a cockroach

'Lo child,Hey, how's your hellscape? I'm feeling more and more connected to the world around me lately, which is just as good for your mental health as everyone tells you. And that doesn't mean I've got a lot of people blowing up my phone - I'm quite bad at r…


Your grist shipment will be delayed

'Lo childs,As predicted, it's been what I believe scientists call "a motherfucker of a week." Training for new job is rough but exciting, and I am daily witness to all kinds of human behavior that I have no doubt will be very artistically productive. That's h…


Got a few minutes I can waste?

'Lo child,So, I retitled the sonnet I posted today from what it was when I wrote it a few years ago, and the reason I did that was to get your attention. I talk directly to you a lot, and most of the time when I’m doing that, I’m just trying to connect, I’m t…


Power Word of the Week: RICTUS

'Lo child,The reason your newsletter - my newsletter? - OUR newsletter has been all philosophizing and no fun lately is because of aforementioned Life Stuff, most prominent of which is a new job. As you'll be aware from your own interactions with capitalism, …


You take 6d10 Paragraph Damage! Roll a reflex save to dodge

'Lo children,When I'm pontificating - I need one of those "ON AIR" signs they have for radio stations, a huge flashy red one that says "PONTIFICATING" - I often make very broad statements about human behavior and motivations. I often say "we" as if I'm speaki…


That's NOT what 'iconoclast' means, Kyle

'Lo child,I assume you've noticed, during your ongoing efforts to keep your spam filter from eating this newsletter due to my satirical subject lines - which I truly appreciate - that I'm the kind of person who tends to say stuff people don't like to hear.The…


Let's have some fun with nips and Nazis!

'Lo child,I've always had some... strange thoughts kicking around in here about how we visualize love, and how we write history. Pop culture and stories give us this model of both love and historical truth that looks transcendent, everlasting... but what make…


Taking the Slow Train to Molovempt Alpha

'Lo children,Lots of things descending, Life Things™, which have been getting in the way of sustained work. Also, though, these Genshin vision thingies involve a rather ridiculous process that I'm still adapting for best effect.


In Which I Once Again Sneakily Shift the Topic to Gender

'Lo child,Our Power Word of the Week this time is dissociation! So let's talk about it.Your Beloved Personality has a wide range of brainweasels scampering around upstairs, chewing wires and causing insurance claims. Before trauma therapy, I'd collected quite…


We're dyeing cats like you wouldn't believe out here!

'Lo child,Hey, it's Pride! I hope your local celebration is busier than a dyke in a hardware store, and absolutely fascist-free.As you can probably imagine, my shelves, countertops, and surfaces just overflow with dragon ass and anime girls, because I paint a…


Subject Matter Interesting to White Men

'Lo child,Did you happen to play Firewatch? It had a pretty sexy marketing campaign back in 2015-16 when it came out, sexy enough to make certain reviewers decry it as the videogame equivalent of "Oscar-bait." I suppose it might be that, if we were to take th…


The Perks of Being a Figment

'Lo child,They say that every painting is a self-portrait, that an artist can't help but depict themselves in their work, but I feel that's got more to do with our impulse to personify everything - like we discussed in our spicy talk about deontology, we have…


Power Word of the Week: PERSPICACITY

'Lo child,It might surprise you, but I see myself as a lucky person. If anyone was counting, there are plenty of reasons to fault my luck, but I'm an absurdist, y'see, and so I think of 'luck' in its most pure and value-neutral form. In a surprisingly short t…


Why should you go to Heaven?

'Lo child,So a couple days ago, Activision-Blizzard-King-McDonalds-Playmobil dropped this hilarious chart on us and bellied up to the internet for their Good Boy Activism Points. They knew they would get Good Boy Activism Points for this, because as you can s…


Power Word of the Week: RESIDUUM

'Lo childs,Enclosed please find your anticipated foreshortened newsletter due to second eye-polishing and associated residuum and folderol.Beneath: images of our Nightmare Before Christmas miniature, meticulously recreated by Cult Elder Viki Winter and painte…


This week on the zoetrope... it's that seizure you've been waiting for!

'Lo child,Seen your shadow lately?I've been missing mine, which troubles me - reminds me of this thing I saw on the zoetrope recently. Mine doesn't get Riverdale, so I ended up watching a story by Hans Christian Andersen called "The Shadow." It's about a man …


Snakes, but in a theoretical physics way

'Lo child!I have the kind of brain that hares off with any idea and starts constructing a world on that basis alone. It's really an impulse toward synthesis - I like to bring disparate or incompatible things together and see what they make when juxtaposed, an…


Hey Supergiant, wanna get with this?

'Lo child,This newsletter is basically, well -