Did you miss me? I missed you too!
Welcome to the new week.
You know Bob Marley yeah? Well, if you don’t, we need to question your taste in music and maybe your life decisions too😒Such ignorance.
Anyway, asides from ‘No Woman No Cry’ (which most Nigerians seem to know), Bob Marley has this song titled: Don’t Worry’ that has lyrics like this,
“Three little birds singing sweet songs,
of melodies pure and true,
singing ‘this is my message to you’ ”
Well, it turns out, there was just one little blue bird that sang a song to the Nigerian government. The problem was the song wasn’t sweet and they didn’t like the message.
Twitter basically said,
“Sorry o, you cannot make genocidal tweets on our platform.”
That was all they said and whoosh, the Nigerian government lost it! Like, fireworks blaring, guns blazing.
I mean all my life, I have never seen Nigerian government implement something so fast.
There’s this thing they say,
‘When you’re happy, you enjoy the beat, when you’re sad, you understand the lyrics’
For the very first time in my life that Adele song, where she says,
‘It was just like a movie, it was just like a song……”
came to life. O shock mi mehn.
This is what I think went on in their head.
Nigerian Government: Omg. Twitter is so disrespectful. What an insort!
The Voice of Reason in Their Head: But wait na, shebi you accepted the terms and conditions before joining Twitter?
NG: And so?
TVOR: Your tweet violated Twitter rules na. it was targeted at a group of people. It was borderline hate speech.
NG: Do you know who we are?!! It’s the President forgorssake.
Someone in the NG: (whispers) Ode. It’s the PRESIDENCY, not the PRESIDENT.
TVOR: That one doesn’t even make sense. Small play, you want to ban Nigerians from Twitter.
NG: Our counterparts in foreign jurisdictions and our Chinese brothers have done it. We might as well do it for the good of Nigeria.
TVOR: I see where this is coming from. Just say it with your chest that you’ve been looking for a way to pass the social media bill. Also, EndSars is still paining you right? Because if you’re angry over a deleted post, you should ban Facebook too.
NG: You actually have a lot of nerve. If you use Twitter, you’re disobeying the law and you’re going to be prosecuted for that.
TVOR: Eh ehn. Thank God there’s a SAN amongst you. I’m sorry o, but following the case of Aoko v Fagbemi (1961) where the judge quoted Section 21, subsection 10 of the Nigerian constitution that states;
“No person shall be convicted of a criminal offence unless the offence is defined and the penalty, therefore, is prescribed in a written law”
You people gave this Twitter ban on Twitter. It has not been passed into law either by the legislature or by a court of law. Isn’t this against the principle of legality? Can the Vice President answer me since he’s a SAN?
(TVOR peers into NG and sees that the VP is trying to answer but his hands are tied and his mouth is gagged.)
NG: Izz like you are mad. Rational thoughts are hereby banned in this country.
(Thinking process ends.)
Well, I figured this was what happened when this decision was taken. It was particularly distressing for me.
Twitter is the place I get to view your reactions, comments and kind words regarding the newsletter and they wanted to take that away from me! From us! From Consonance Club!! The gods forbid it!
Anyway, when it comes to the Twitter ban in Nigeria, I rely on the words of an erudite philosopher for motivation. This scholar named Precious from Consonance said and I quote:
“Country wey we no fit enter by visa; we go enter by VPN’
This just goes to say that our Twitter account is still active as we shall be tweeting from the abroad and the newsletter will always be here to serve you.
Anyway, in light of this issue, let’s briefly talk about VPNs today.
I know, I know.If you’re getting this newsletter, chances are you understand what a VPN is.😒 Let me do my job okay? T for tenks.
We all know a VPN is a Virtual Private Network and we most likely understand how it works.
VPNs create private connections to the internet from a public internet provider by protecting your IP address.
This has a number of benefits, first of which is privacy. No website can trace your digital footprints on the internet. Your browsing history and personal details are largely untraceable and this results in protecting you from cyber fraud. It’s way harder for your personal info or credit details to be stolen online if you’re using a VPN.
Also, it helps you scale over geographical blockers. You know those annoying things on Twitter or some other sites, where they say certain content is not available in your region? Well, VPN clears all of that.
VPN can also boost your internet speed etc.
Now, why am I mentioning these things?
Well, I know most of the people in Consonance Club have coconut heads and therefore will use VPNs, however, I need you guys to stay careful outchea. 🤧
VPNs are plenty like sand in the desert, but it’s great if you check out the features of a VPN before you use it.
Some VPNs can increase your internet speed while some will slow it down.
Some have the best anti-blockers. For example, Netflix as a brand keeps developing great tech to block VPNs, so, if that’s the major reason you’re using a VPN, be sure the one you choose is really good at that.
Some of them like TunnelBear, Windscribe and CyberGhost are the best for first-timers because they’re easy to use.
I need to mention that sometimes when you’re using a VPN, the connection might get lost. What then happens is the site you’re on now sees your real face & your real country and you could possibly get blocked.
Some VPNs like CyberGhost and Private VPN will automatically disconnect you from the internet if the server ever drops.
Basically, I and the team need you to stay safe out there. If need be, you can try to access Twitter from the web, use an app that masks your Twitter app or if you use a Samsung device, just use Samsung Max.
Stay safe out there. Things will hopefully get better. ♥️