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Emanu-News 2022-01-14 בְּשׂוֹרוֹת עִמָּנוּ

Emanu-News  בְּשׂוֹרוֹת עִמָּנוּ
Emanu-News 2022-01-14 בְּשׂוֹרוֹת עִמָּנוּ
By Congregation Emanu-El • Issue #508 • View online
Weekly news from Congregation Emanu-El, Victoria, B.C.

Editor's Note
This week we have a new column: Hebrew Q&A.
Please note that Synagogue services are moving online for now (see letter from Rabbi Harry below). Zoom links are provided with Rabbi Harry’s letter and in “The Week Ahead”, below. During this time, pre-registration is not required to attend online services.
Despite this change, there are still opportunities to join with community and help others - read on to learn more about what’s happening in the week ahead.
Emanu-El News
From Rabbi Harry: Services Moving Online
Updated - Shabbat Shirah Commemoration: A Reprise – Congregation Emanu-El News
Tu B’Shevat Seder and Environmental Commitment
Tikkun Olam: Warm Feet and Happy Hearts
Congregation Emanu-El Shabbat Dinners Postponed
From the Jewish Cemetery….
Introduction to Judaism
Contribute to The Good Food Box
Shabbat Shevat 6, 5782
  • Candle lighting: 4:27 PM
  • Parashat Beshalach
  • Shabbat Shirah
  • Exodus 14:26-17:16
  • Haftarah: Judges 4:4-5:31
The Week Ahead
View the full calendar on the web (mobile-friendly view). See above for Zoom links to events offered virtually.
Webmail users: If this newsletter is cut off, view the full issue online to see all the way to the end of The Last Word.
Hebrew Q&A
Q: In Hebrew, how is it possible to discern when to pronounce shva as /e/, or as a pause?
Test Your Lateral Thinking
An elderly woman lives on the 35th floor and hates taking the stairs. Every day she takes the elevator down to the lobby floor to go to work. When she comes home from work, she takes the elevator to the 25th floor and walks the rest of the way up, except on days when it rains. Those days she takes the elevator all the way home. Why does she walk the last ten flights of stairs if she hates it so much?
*Nothing To Do With Being Jewish
*Nothing To Do With Being Jewish
Community Connections
CC#2 - Caregiver Needed
Housekeeper wanted for a single, senior woman in a wheelchair. The job will entail some weekend and /or weekday shifts (to be determined pending caregiver’s availability). Some personal care and meal preparation required. There is a friendly, elderly dog in the home.  - Ruth Simkin
Respond to CC#2 (your email will be forwarded to the contact person)
Synagogue Office
Congregation Emanu-El, 1461 Blanshard St., Victoria, BC V8W 2J3, Canada
Office hours:
  • Tuesday, Wednesday & Thursday from 9:30 am – 2:30 pm
  • Friday 9:30 am – 12:00 pm
About this Newsletter
Copyright © 2021 Congregation Emanu-El. All rights reserved.
Editorial Board:
  • News Editor: Katie Stafford
  • NTDWBJ, TYLT, & Last Word: Jonathan Ure Stoppi
  • Communications Committee Chair: Lincoln Shlensky
  • Reviewers: Rabbi Harry, Susan Holtz
You are receiving this email because you're a Congregation member, and/or asked to subscribe.
The Last Word
Schlesinger’s wayward brother, Sam, walked into a restaurant with a full-grown ostrich behind him. The waitress asked for their orders.
“A hamburger, fries, and a coke,” Sam replied, and turned to the ostrich, “What’s yours?” 
“I’ll have the same,” said the ostrich. 
A short time later the waitress returned with the order. 
“That’ll be $9.40 please,” she said—and Sam reached into his pocket and pulled out the exact change for payment.
The next day, Sam and the ostrich came again, and Sam said, “A hamburger, fries, and a coke.”
The ostrich said, “I’ll have the same.”
Again Sam reached into his pocket and paid with exact change.
This became routine, until one day, the two entered again. 
“The usual?” asked the waitress.
”No, this is Friday night—so I’ll have a steak, baked potato, and salad,” said Sam. 
“Same,” said the ostrich.
Shortly after that, the waitress brought the order and said, “That’ll be $32.62.” 
Once again Sam pulled the exact change out of his pocket and placed it on the table.
The waitress couldn’t contain her curiosity any longer. 
“Excuse me, sir. How do you manage to always come up with the exact change out of your pocket every time?”
“Well,” said Sam, “several years ago I was cleaning the attic, and found an old lamp. When I rubbed it, a genie appeared and offered me two wishes. My first wish was that if I ever had to pay for anything, I would just put my hand in my pocket and the right amount of money would always be there.”
“That’s brilliant!” said the waitress… “Most people would wish for a million dollars or something, but you’ll always be as rich as you want for as long as you live!”
“That’s right. Whether it’s a gallon of milk, or a Rolls Royce, the exact money is always there,” said Sam.
The waitress asked, “But, sir, what’s with the ostrich?”
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Weekly news of Congregation Emanu-El, Victoria, B.C.

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