For example, if friends answer “great” when you ask how they are doing, simply ask them a deeper follow-up question like “how are you sleeping?”.
If you feel like you’re not allowed to complain now, since there is a lot to be grateful for, Esther Perel explains “You can feel humble, you can feel thankful to things, but you can’t feel great in this moment because if you’re feeling great in this moment, you’re detached. You’re disconnected.”
An here’s the favorite one I took out from this interview. Each morning give your partner a warning of where your emotional level is at with a percentage of how full your tank is. Now, if I don’t sleep well, I will let my wife know I’m just at 30%. It helps so much to navigate through daily life together.