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Today's Big Stuff 7.28.22

Today's Big Stuff by Adam Parkhomenko & Sam Youngman
It’s Thursday. There are 103 days until the midterm elections. Manchin and Schumer get nuts, Republicans have a meltdown and Clarence Thomas loses his teaching gig. 
Be advised: This newsletter uses the f-word a lot. We also spell like shit and make a lot of fucked up jokes at Republicans’ expense.  
Note: Sexy Patriots! What in the hell is going on?! No, not with you. We already know you’re sexy and patriotic and working your fine ass off to save this country. We mean what is going on that the Senate is actually doing shit and Manchin helped us stick it to Mitch McConnell?! We don’t know how to act! We’re just not prepared for good news shit like this. 

Jeff Stein
After all the talk of Dem ineptitude, if they pass this bill it will be quite likely the biggest climate bill in history & one of the most significant tax hikes on corporations in decades
So what the fuck do we do now? Like are we supposed to apologize to Manchin because that just ain’t really our style and we really fucking don’t wanna. Maybe we should just take a moment to celebrate. But only after it passes. If we know our party like we think we do, some corrupt and self-obsessed asshat who probably refers to themself as a problem-solver will try to fuck this up.
But we’ve got some good shit to talk about, and we should talk about it. Maybe more than that though, we’ve got reason to have hope. And goddamn couldn’t we all use more of that?
Note two: Btw, if your friends and that dickhead uncle on Facebook want to know what Joe Biden has done, show them this…
Jesse Ferguson

- American Rescue Plan

- Bipartisan Infrastructure Investments

- Semiconductor Manufacturing

- New Gun Safety Laws

- Clean Energy Jump Start

- Lowering Drug Prices

- Tax Reform, Closing Loopholes

- Gas Prices Going Down

- Record Job Growth

Just saying.
Note three: Reminder, SPs, we’re doing the Great American Scream on Aug. 5 at 1 pm ET. Are you ready to let the world hear you?
You can now signup up to participate in the Great American Scream here.
You can share the Great American Scream on twitter here.
Note four: Some outlets are reporting about Andrew Yang’s new third party. We’re not that fucking dumb. It really is the golden age of the con-artist. NO LINK
Note five: Cassidy Hutchinson has been cooperating with DOJ. The Secret Service and NBC’s Peter Alexander are going to be furious. More: CNN
Note six: Mick Mulvaney of CBS News has agreed to talk to the Jan. 6 committee. And yeah, we want to make that sting for CBS. More: MSN
Note seven: We’re gonna talk more about the Republican meltdown in the news section, but please take a moment to enjoy how angry Mitch McConnell is. 
Leader McConnell
Democrats have already crushed American families with historic inflation.
Now they want to pile on giant tax hikes that will hammer workers and kill many thousands of American jobs.
First they killed your family's budget. Now they want to kill your job too.
Note eight: That’s what big mad looks like for a demon tortoise. 
Note nine: Remember when white dude reporters told us that election law Georgia passed just weeks after an attempted coup was no big deal? Well it was. And now dropboxes in four big counties have been dropped from 107 to 25. Those white dude reporters can eat shit. More: NPR
Note 10: This is one of the funniest fucking things we’ve seen in forever.
soul nate
why does every message leading up to january 6 look like this
Note 11: Remember that kid from Kentucky in the MAGA hat who sued news organizations for calling him a Trumply little shit or something? Well his lawsuits got tossed. More:
Note 12: Kushner says in this new book… you know what… we’re not gonna do this. Fuck that little prick.
Note 13: Facebook (we’re not calling that shit Meta) posted its first-ever revenue drop. Is it liberal Christmas? You know, the one we don’t declare war on. More: Bloomberg
Note 14: It’s pretty hilarious watching the RNC threaten Trump that it will stop paying his legal bills if he announces his run before the midterms. What’s next? Ronna gonna threaten to change her name back? More: ABC News
Note 15: What John Fetterman is doing to “Dr.” Oz might be the best show on television. Did our party suddenly get all competent and shit? 
John Fetterman
NJ's own @StevieVanZandt 🎸 has a VERY special message for Dr. Oz!!

So Dr. Oz just fuhgeddaboudit!
Note 16: Also, for another show recommendation, check out Hot Ones on YouTube. It’s not what it sounds like.
Note 17: While we’re excited about the prospect of this new legislation, the economy did contract the first half of this year. That ain’t good, but we’re still on the right track and the Fed Chair says we’re not in a recession. More: CNBC
Note 18: We’re so glad to see the U.S. doing everything it can to get Brittney Griner home. It’s worse than unfortunate that we’re trying to negotiate with a psycho douchebag. More: NBC News
Note 19: Trump says he’s suing CNN because they called him a liar. Let’s hope CNN doesn’t apologize and beg for forgiveness. Also, he ain’t gonna sue. More: Business Insider
Note 20: Holy shit, SPs, there’s still so much news! So let’s get to it! We love y’all, and we hope you’re taking a moment to feel a little bit of hope today. Have a great day!
We’ve never seen politics twitter quite as stunned as it was yesterday when Joe Manchin and Chuck Schumer announced they had a deal to address prescription drug prices, healthcare, taxes and the climate emergency. Nobody could believe that Manchin actually came through or that they successfully rolled McConnell. But goddamn it sure looks like that’s what happened. How do we know? Just look how mad Republicans are. More: CNN
Like they really didn’t take it well. So they capped off a day that started with them voting against the right to contraception by voting against wounded veterans and telling House Republicans to vote in favor of China on the CHIPS bill. They’re so used to kicking sand in our faces, they literally fell apart when we returned the favor. We’re gonna be cautiously optimistic about this thing until it’s on Biden’s desk, but damn it feels good to piss those fuckers off like this. More: The Guardian, The Hill
No thanks, professor
Clarence Thomas, who just took delight in ripping basic human rights away from millions of women just months after his deranged wife participated in a coup attempt, will no longer teach a seminar at George Washington University. Students didn’t want his ass there. Also, why do all these law schools have such scummy people teaching? Are people really going into debt to get an education from fucking Jonathan Turley? More: GW Hatchet
Today’s clips
White House Middle East coordinator Brett McGurk told a group of think tank experts last week it’s “highly unlikely” that the 2015 nuclear deal with Iran will be revived in the near future, according to three U.S. sources who were on the call. More: Axios
Twenty Republicans on Wednesday voted against legislation that would reauthorize programs to combat human trafficking. More: USA Today
Sen. Dick Durbin (D-Ill.), the No. 2 Senate Democrat, announced on Thursday he had tested positive for COVID-19, making him the latest senator to contract the virus. More: The Hill
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Adam Parkhomenko and Sam Youngman
Adam Parkhomenko and Sam Youngman

The way the news should sound when the whole fucking world is on fire.

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