4.27.22
It’s Wednesday. There are 196 days until the midterm elections. Kevin McCarthy is an endless disaster, wishing the best to our VP and Biden brings a hostage home.
Be advised: We’re taking off Thursday and Friday, but we promise to cuss a lot and spell shit wrong in our personal lives two.
Note: Sexy Patriots! It’s true that we’re going to take a couple of days off so Sam can sit in a little chair in the corner and wonder where everything went wrong. Hey, we offered to get him a cake, but he said this is his birthday tradition. Sounds fun. But before we depart, we want to talk about what we’re calling the Grinch problem.
Yeah, we’re totally gonna fuck up another beloved childhood memory for you. Sorry about that. So what is the Grinch problem? Well most of us saw Dr. Seuss’s the Grinch, and saw that nasty fucker steal them nice Who people’s Christmas and then we saw his heart grow five sizes, proving to hopeless optimists everywhere that anyone can change — even the kind of piece of shit who steals a whole town’s Christmas and makes his little tiny dog pull the fucking overloaded sleigh.
We saw the Grinch problem when Trump was elected. Otherwise smart and sexy people were like hey maybe it won’t be the bad and he won’t kill like a million of us and the whole fucking country runs out of toilet paper. And we all know how that shit turned out. Now we’re seeing the Grinch problem with Elon. So let’s say this — there is no better Elon. He is exactly the dorky monster you think he is. And yes, he is probably going to fuck up twitter beyond recognition. Hell, yesterday he was pushing that stupid fucking Hunter Biden shit.