I personally love detailed intimate scenes following a slow burn ship. I know that detailed sex scenes aren’t for everyone, but I enjoy both reading and writing them. I’m an author who goes into detail with gore and fight scenes, so if I can have the painful and horrible, I should be able to have the pleasurable too.
That said, I don’t tend to write them like other authors, or at least those in the erotica genre. The language I use is much softer. I like using ‘member’ and ‘erection’ or ‘warmth’ when describing genitals. Not that harsh language is bad! I just prefer softer language myself, and that’s okay. It’s hard for me to take ‘cock’ and ‘pussy’ seriously when I just see them as silly slang terms.
More than that, I like describing the emotion over the mechanics. The waves of pleasure, adrenaline spikes, and tantalizing language that happens during sex. That’s my favorite thing to read and write when it comes to sex scenes. Positions and that sort of thing are boring to write, but they’re necessary.
Finally, aftercare is incredibly important, especially when it comes to BDSM scenes! I like describing that, and how the dominant will take care of the submissive. We need more positive representation of BDSM in general in media.
At the moment, I’ve only delved into male x female relationships, with the male being the dominant. That’s my comfort zone, but I’m hoping to explore in my writing more soon. Given I’m a bi woman (something I found out only a few months ago) who is in a relationship with a cisgender heterosexual guy, and haven’t ever explored in my past (long story short, I had a pretty bad fear of sex that took years of therapy to get over), I’ll need to get a sensitivity reader for woman x woman sex scenes. Something I do want to write, of course, given I’d be engaging in trying that if I wasn’t already in a very happy monogamous relationship.
All of that said, I think people generally like my sex scenes even if they are a bit soft when it comes to language. Happy writing and reading!
Fun Facts from The Kingdoms of Blood:
“Unsurprisingly, Ares has befriended actual crows by offering them food, and thus the crows in Elapid City treat him and his gang very kindly.”
“Smoke had been very afraid of Sam, secretly, and guilty for a while. It took a lot of convincing by Darcia to hang out with her more, and now the two get along very well.”
“The result of a planned brawl with Ares Arachnida and Sam Viper was a lot of scorched ground and an unclear winner.”