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OneSidedJustice "Hoping You Are Being Transferred" - Issue #20

Nicole Ivie
Nicole Ivie
October 13, 2022
Hi Babe,
Well, it’s now been close to two days since I have heard from you. I am praying that is because you are in the middle of being transferred to your “home prison”. That also means that I will not be sending this letter until I get confirmation.
I know you know me well enough to have been feeling discomfort on my behalf because yes, you told me to prepare for the silence, but I am not doing very well with it. I was grateful to be able to check with K so I knew that you had reached out on Tuesday. This is a new emotion. The sheer fact that I know if I didn’t hear from you for weeks, I would have absolutely no way to find out why. There is no-one to call. The prison system isn’t much for transparency. Horrific thoughts go through my mind knowing that you could be in the hospital, extremely ill or as imagination goes, worst case scenario, dead and I would be at the mercy of information that could take weeks to make it to me. I am literally laughing at myself considering all of the training I have had regarding mental health and irrational thoughts but let me tell you…… no matter what your mind continues to debate, the anxiety that fills your chest with an uncontrollable heart flutter that leaves a continuous uneasy sensation is to say the least ANNOYING! ☹
I will however continue to try and look on the bright side. I keep telling myself that this silence is a good thing. It may mean that I will be one day closer to a personal visit. One day closer to a more concrete schedule where I won’t keep my phone at my side every second of every day so I won’t miss your 1 opportunity to call. One day closer to not being stuck in the middle of processing for months on end.
Have I told you lately how much I miss you! 😊 Here is something that we haven’t really talked about. As I told you, I am so excited to have M flying in on Monday. I am not sure where she will be sleeping as she obviously has a few choices, but as I was wondering if she would want to bunk with me last night, I looked over at your pillows and your side of the bed. It is almost like there is an imaginary wall preventing me from moving over to your side in the middle of the night. Each and every morning when I get up, the bed is completely untouched on your side. The pillows have not moved and the sheets and comforter are crisp and flat. Even though Duke tends to lay on your side, there isn’t even an indent that can be seen on the top to show that my feet even swayed past the center of the bed. I wonder why that is? We both know that when you were physically there, the boundaries did not exist. I miss your late night whisper, “Babe, I’m moving my arm and am turning over.” As you gently kissed my forehead as you were asking me to move from your chest to my pillow. I swear that was a nightly ritual. Anyway – I’m pretty sure if she decides to bunk with me that she will not be disturbed. ❤💕💖
You are my world and I know God hears my prayers. I also know that he probably thinks of me as a spoiled two year old toddler as I react to his current “No’s”. 🤣😂I trust in his plan and I am honored to believe. I find comfort as I am confident that our future is BRIGHT!!! Please never lose faith that the battle I fight is worth every tear, every obstacle, every dark shadow. We will prevail!!!
~Your Faithful Soldier
Nicole
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Nicole Ivie
Nicole Ivie

Personal Letters mailed to Mark Ivie - Inmate #QPxxxx

This Is Not Easy

Publishing my personal letters to my husband is not easy. If I wasn't fighting such a devastating fight, I wouldn't even have to consider it. But my goal is for you, the reader to know who we are. To know that we are very real, caring and loving individuals who are facing an unbelievable nightmare. So, here you go - my heart on my sleeve.

His transfer just took place on Wed. July 27th and my goal will be to support him with daily letters. We're just getting started! If you choose to sign up for the newsletter, we have been told it initially goes directly to your SPAM filter. Please add OneSidedJustice@getrevue.co (A Twitter Company) to your safe sender list.

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