The algebra of a well-lived life puts friendship in the center of the equation.
Enlightening article by David Perell as usual. I’ve always considered friendships to be an important pillar in my life, and because I’ve always wanted to be really intentional about who I spend my time with, I try to keep my friendship circle like my vision for my body - strong and lean 😛.
On choosing your friends:
The mark of a great friend is somebody who believes in you, looks out for you, and has your best interests in mind. Those who give you honest feedback, even when the truth is hard to share and even harder to hear are worth their weight in gold.
Cultivating the chosen friendship:
When you speak with somebody at length, you realize that everybody — yes, everybody — faces a waterfall of challenges. In difficult moments, friends serve as guides. Through dialogue and feedback, they help us navigate the unknown, alleviate suffering, and dodge the bullets of everyday life.
Struggle and shared experiences are like fuel for friendship — especially novel, challenging, and unfamiliar ones — are the best way to foster tight bonds. Host a retreat. Travel with friends. Rent a car, start driving, and see where you end up. One close friend says that relationships, from friends to lovers, are only built once bodily fluids start flowing: tears, blood, sweat, and you know… whatever else.
Make your friend choices intentional:
Cultivating these life-long, work-centric friendships can come with tradeoffs. Building friendships doesn’t scale. On one hand, you want to build relationships with enough people, so that when you’re ready to start a company or recruit for an executive position, at least one person in your friend group will be able to join you. But on the other hand, deep time is the best way to build friendships, and there’s only so much time in the day.
Deep friendships take time, so choose carefully who you truly want to invest your time and energy in, especially in people who can help lift you up, and you them!
If you’ve made it to my phone book, you’re pretty much someone I consider important someway or another in my life. However, the quote below has also encouraged me to open up my circle to make the effort to network with more chosen peers:
“The mistake of youth is thinking that the mentors you need are older than you. That you should work on getting in a room with some powerful person because that’s going to change your life. It’s not true. What changes your life is your peers… The people you rise up with. They’re your power base. Not the person who’s already done it.”
So, who wants to grow and rise up together? :)